A friend has prompted me to put keyboard to screen

And for novelty value, a) I really do have a friend and b) I'm not euphemistically meaning me.

This person (whose gender will remain undisclosed) is selfless, friendly, tolerant and hard working. Said person is everything I try to be. But they are put upon, with an unhappiness that runs deep. No further details can be given as it would imply their identity.

I understand what you are going through and I share your hurt. I try to help where I can, but I am aware that I am just an average Joe. My advice realistically counts for nothing and I can make no real or lasting difference to your life. Years from now I shall undoubtedly be forgotten, but in the here and now, I offer my friendship. That is something I can offer freely and without malice.

My friendships are make with difficulty. I am a complex person and trust with trepidation. You are very similar to me and I feel an empathy that means I understand what you are going through but don't wish to interfere. My thoughts on your "predicament" are my own that have been vaguely voiced, whether or not I agree with my own thoughts and whether or not they are in everyone's best interests.

I have been accused of being sensible. From the age of about 8, I've been going on 40. My brain is sensible, my body is not. My heart sometimes says things that are the opposite of my brain because I am an old romantic. My liver says things that generally involve the demon booze that swings my mood. My feeling as a guy generally runs to guy stuff - the usual.

But the brain tends to win as the other organs have no thought process (stop laughing at the back). There are times when my brain wonders why it is so sensible. Sometimes the heart should win and "you" should get what is right, not what is sensible. After all, I'm becoming increasingly aware that this isn't a dress rehearsal, this is not only the act but it is the final act.

The trouble is that we all have to go with the brains. My friends are the ones who live by that, not the ones who live by their hearts, livers or loins. Sometimes I desperately want to be ruled by something other than my brain but that is the way I was made.

I cannot offer advise except that I have 2 ears that can listen. My eyes have seen, my heart has felt but my brain continues to say the same. I know what you SHOULD do, my brain may equally tell you the sensible option. Like Dr Crane...I'm listening. And in sorting out your problems, in some small way I'm either sorting out my own, making them go away or totally ignoring them.

The greatest of these is the last.