Friday, February 06, 2009

Global warming

The planet is warming, the ice caps are shrinking. Many theories have been proposed. Here is a new one...

 

One hundred years ago, there were few cattle and no television. People worked long hours, toiling away in manual jobs, eating what they could afford. There was no problem with global warming.

 

Today there is fast food. This requires large amounts of cattle to produce the burgers. The cattle produce methane which is warming the planet. The cattle are exothermic which is warming the planet. Millions of people are now obese from eating too much fast food. The fatties produce methane which is warming the planet. The fatties are exothermic which is warming the planet. These fatties are sitting at home warming their houses with electricity from fossil fuel supplied power stations which are warming the planet.

 

There is now a problem with global warming...

 

The solution is easy. Reduce the amount of cattle on the planet. This will have the knock on effect of raising prices of fast food. This will mean that fatties need to get out and get better jobs. This will improve the economy. They will be getting more exercise so they will get slimmer. This will reduce their methane output. Fewer cattle will produce less methane too. Being out of the house more often will cut electricity consumption. This is good for the world.

 

You can reduce the amount of cattle by not eating fast food, causing the chains to require less meat.

 

 

Save the polar bear...boycott a burger.

No comments: